Area Woman ‘Holds Space’ for Partner: Sends Book-Length Text Message Detailing His Every Flaw

Volume 1, Issue 6

SAULT STE. MARIE, ON - Local resident Theresa Bright recently did her partner, Bruce Allen, the solid favour of “holding space” for him in the form of a book-length text message. The digital manifesto detailed his every flaw in the hope that it would serve as a road map to his ultimate evolution.

The couple was spotted at Shabby Motley Handcraft on Queen Street, where Bruce sat quietly clutching a lukewarm latte while Theresa highlighted several key passages from the text on her phone. When asked for his thoughts on the exhaustive inventory of his shortcomings, Bruce agreed it was a vital guide for his self-improvement. “Honestly, I would have no direction without Theresa,” he said, staring blankly at a display of artisanal yarn.

“I hold space for Bruce about twice a week, letting him know how to self-guide toward his own actualization,” Theresa explained as they began a brisk walk along the boardwalk. “I’m just happy I can provide the clarity Bruce needs so he may one day become all that I need him to be,” she added, pausing to pull a lint ball from his t-shirt.

Bruce noted, “I find it absolutely liberating to have space held for me in this manner. It’s like having a life coach you also get to share a Netflix account with.”

The interview ended abruptly when Theresa tapped her watch and looked side-eyed at Bruce.

Bruce’s mother, Rita Allen, reached for comment later that afternoon at Reggie’s Tavern noted with raspy voice: “He’s a good kid, but he’s got the survival skills of bagged spinach. If Theresa wants to text him a manual on how to be an adult, more power to her.”

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